The Sox Will Rock Your Face!

I am freaking excited that the Red Sox are like the best team in baseball thus far (that’s what the stats say so gimme a break) and I like to celebrate that fact by blasting some tunes on my computer/stereo/Ipod what-have-you. I like to listen to all things that get me fired up after a win, or real depressing stuff to help the booze go down cleaner after they dump one in the latter innings. Even though we no longer have Bronson Arroyo and his guitar “talents”, I like to think I have channeled a part of the Red Sox musical muse.

I know you’re thinking “why the hell are you telling me this stuff, you psychotic idiot?” but hear me out cause this is gonna be good.

Ok, so this is how it’s gonna work: Eric and I are going to go all “rock star” with the Sox playoff games this year. We are gonna lay down some “fat tracks”, some “fresh beats” and some “utter clichés” for each and every playoff game the Red Sox are involved in. Now what I need from readers (if we still have any) is some suggestions (just leave them as comments) on what songs might fit different situations that might pop up during this series with the Angels (and hopefully beyond). Maybe something like “Big win = AC/DC, Thunderstruck”, or “Big Loss = Smashing Pumpkins, F*@# You An Ode To Nobody”. These are things we like… but I am always looking for fresh views.

I hope this catches on… cause we’re doing it anyway. Please post a comment if you have any suggestions, and hey, maybe if it’s any good we’ll use it and you can bitch and moan about how we stole your idea. Oh, and I bet Eric will have a post season match-up post or something coming soon too, because I’m “fun dad” and he’s “work dad”. Sure, he’ll help you with your science project volcano, but I’ll take you to Disney World.

Game 84: I Love Playing the Rays

Final Score: Boston Red Sox 15, Tampa Bay Devil Rays 4

What better way to celebrate a night on the town than with a pants-down spanking of the teal trouble makers from the Florida Bay. Eric and I ventured to the always fantastic Sox bar Professor Thom’s (proud owners of the handmade Roger Clemens bobblehead doll you see to your left) to see Beckett get his 12th win in grand fashion. Nothing cures a hitting slump quite like a visit with the Rays and a three game sweep was just what the doctor ordered after a disappointing run last month. Why can’t we play these guys every week?? Wait… I guess we are pretty much going to after the All-Star break.

So much crazy stuff happened tonight I'm gonna break it down for you in bullet form:

• Beckett was nasty through 6 innings, had 9K’s and at least one fan that the bar who was willing to look past the fact that (in her words) she would be a one weekend girlfriend.


• Drew was 2 for 2… in the first inning. I was still on my second beer when he got his second hit. I want to see a stat for that.


• Coco Crisp had a grand slam in the first, but came up with the bases loaded 2 other times in this affair and only managed one more RBI. I honestly can’t tell if that’s good or bad.


• Even Lugo got in on this beat down. The shortstop that stops short got 2 RBI but also managed to ground into a killer double play just to make sure we didn’t forget who we were dealing with.


• The Rays catcher Navarro smashed his face into Beckett’s shoulder during a collision at first base. Beckett was fine (and continued to pitch) while Navarro broke his freaking jaw. Call me poetic, but I think this incident was a metaphor for the game overall.


• Lowell had 5 hits, 5 RBI and about 500 comparisons to George Clooney. Most of the bar patrons were certain he would be the classy gentleman at your Red Sox social gathering. I’m not convinced.


• As much as I bash Timlin, he looked good in his 2 innings of relief tonight. I suppose an 11 run lead is enough to make me comfortable seeing him pitch.


• One of the best moments of the evening goes to Okajima (who didn’t even pitch) because he was the recipient of the final fan vote for the AL All-Star game. Oki tipped his hat to the Fenway crowd while they gave him a standing ovation. However, the applause was slightly muffled due to rampant carpel tunnel syndrome caused by constant and repeated online voting. By my calculations, everyone in Boston and Japan voted for Oki at least 9 times.

That’s the final home game before the All-Star game in San Fran. Now we head to Detroit as the 1st place Tigers host the 1st place Sox. I’m not really a betting man (if I was, I'd see that BetUS.com gives the Tigers the advantage), but I would wager the Sox could use this little momentum boost to ride into Detroit for a few wins - say maybe 2 out of 3?

Come get some you overstuffed striped cats.

Game 15: Hex and Counter Hex

Final Score: Boston Red Sox 7, New York Yankees 6

I feel some deja vu coming on...something about...oh, yes: I can't believe we won this game. You know, just like yesterday. Schilling pitching like one of the many foul things I called him when he served up tasty white plate specials to A-Rod; J. C. Romero, Mr. Soft Underbelly of the Bullpen, pushing things further out of reach in the eighth and everything coming down to the placement abilities of The Machine...I would be lying if I said I hadn't written this game off as an unfortunate loss by the fifth inning. However, the ghost of Red Auerbach, conjured up by tonight's opening ceremonies, seems to have had the same psychic power over the field as filling Fenway with Red Sox legends and thus a win, no matter how fraught the contest.

Red's influence may have spread into other areas: along with the strange powers at work keeping Rivera from locating a pitch in the eighth, two events occurred that may mean new directions for two players:

1. In his last at-bat, against the afore-vilified Romero, Alex Rodriguez hit a double. Yes, he had already hit home runs in his second and third at-bats and scored on a single to right on the next pitch, thereby carrying his team to six runs in the non-A-Rodian fashion we've become accustomed to in the past few weeks - the fashion that had Michael Kaye and John Flaherty panting at his every move like cats in baseball heat - but it was a double and not a home run, despite its poor placement in his wheelhouse. If Rodriguez has finally descended from his hitter's cloud nine and is back amongst the mortal superstars tomorrow, we'll know why: the gods have him hexed.
   
   
2. The Captain went three for four, hit a two out home run off Pettitte to put the Sox back into the game in the fourth and started the scoring drive against Rivera with a single; a scoring drive that saw a triple from the hitless Coco Crisp and (again) the game winning RBI by Alex Cora. Tek hasn't had anything close to a breakout game before tonight; tonight marks the game where he turns around a year of bad numbers and questioning commentators and brings back, via counter hex, that sweet hitting groove.
   

Time to shut your @*$%ing Mouth

Manny: “Hey Bitches! I’m here and ready to rock your faces. This where the party at?”

Everybody else: “Oh! We misjudged you! We’re so sorry! Please forgive us!”

Manny: “Quit your crying. Now back up as I hit some f-ing digners.”

How do you like that? Mr. Ramirez has reported early. The circus is now complete. Let's get this ball rolling already. The first spring training game is Thursday against Toronto and my nipples are pert with anticipation.