Manny Questions are Answered in this Q and bAy (and other bad word plays)

To break this whole Manny trade and Bay pickup deal-e-o I’ve decided to go internal. I will interview… myself… in this in-depth Q and A. Please sit back and enjoy.

Q: Did this Manny deal REALLY need to get done?

A: Oh hell yes. These last few weeks were the final straw in Boston’s love affair with Man-Ram. He can hit the stuffing out of a baseball, but he can burn bridges just as effectively. Besides feuding with teammates (Youk), knocking down team officials and his imaginary injuries… Manny has SAID a ton of stupid things this year too. You can’t have those distractions on a winning team.

Q: Was it a great deal?

A: Oh hell no. You can’t get equal value for a Hall-of-Fame hitter. It doesn’t exist. Plus, throw in the fact that to get a team to take a needy disgruntled player you needed to give up 2 other major league ready players AND pay the rest of his salary… it looks like the Sox got 100% fleeced.

Q: Did they?

A: Not really. Getting rid of Hansen is adding by subtracting. His 5+ ERA and uncanny ability to make blowouts close games will not be missed. Brandon Moss is kind of a sore spot because he would work well in a few places and was a solid 5^th outfielder… but it’s still a backup. And as I stated before… you needed to get Manny out of town. So getting Jason Bay is some really good return on a desperate deal.

Q: What Soundgarden song where you thinking of when the trade was announced?

A: Limo Wreck.

“Building the towers, belongs to the sky
When the whole thing comes crashing down
Don't ask me why”

Q: What feelings were going through your mind when the Manny trade unfolded?

A: Well if the song in any indication, I was ready to write off the season and the team for the foreseeable future. I felt everyone was giving up for no reason. Why not join them?

Q: What was the most shocking moment for you in this whole ordeal?

A: Hearing about the secret meeting between Theo and Sox veterans where everyone agreed that Manny needed to go. Wow. This blew me away. ALL the vets invited wanted him gone? That’s almost unbelievable that nobody was coming to his aid. There must have been so many behind the scene things with Manny that nobody knew about or maybe the idiot savant routine gets old if you are around it all day.

Q: Who got too much blame in this ordeal?

A: I think Theo got a bit too much crap from the fans and media. What the hell was he supposed to do with a player who didn’t want to play? Manny put the Sox in an un-winnable situation that wasn’t going to go away like the last few debacles. This was the end of his contract and the Sox almost got stuck getting nothing for him. Good on Theo for pulling the trigger and getting at least a bat back.

Q: Who deserves more ire than they received?

A: Scott Boras got off with a slap on the wrist in my mind. He barely got a dirty look and he should have gotten at lease 4 or 5 evil stares. This guy takes over Manny at the beginning of the season and Manny being Manny becomes Manny being Madonna for a half season. You don’t think Boras wasn’t saying “Manny you are the best, but they don’t respect you. Are you gonna take that?” on a daily basis? Boras doesn’t get paid if Manny can’t land a fat contract with free agency… so why make him happy in one place? Screw that meddling bloodsucker.

Q: Funniest joke from the Manny trade?

A: Well there are a few:

Manny traded to Moon. Blocked deal when he found out that it wasn’t made of cheese.

Manny to Seattle. Blocked deal when he found out that Sonics season tickets are nonexistent.

Manny to Green Bay for Brett Favre. Yeah, but where are we gonna play him?

Manny to Mars. Blocks trade when he finds out women are from Venus.

Manny to Dodgers so he can play with Nomar and Derek Lowe. Oh wait… no joke… and they are managed by Joe Torre. See? Real life is way better.

Q: So after you talked yourself into the deal, what Soundgarden song popped into your head?

A: Fresh Tendrils:

“Long time coming
It seemed to take me through
Long time coming
Many served the few”

Q: So after his first game, what do you think of Jason Bay?

A: Wow… umm I hate these rush decisions. I mean come on! One game? What a small sample size. Sure he scored both Sox runs, but what does that mean?

Q: No really. Are you now a Bay fan?

A: Hmmm tough to say. I love him… but am I in love with him? I know it’s too soon and he is just a rebound star. But wow… that Canadian grin, sharp ringing triple and sexy OBP? Please Jason, lets get some Molson and just go crazy on each other. Just you me and a bag of bats… call me?

Out Damn Outfielders! OUT!

This is getting crazy. First, Coco starts the season with a sore knee. Then Jacoby sits with a stiff groin. Then Drew misses a week with a tight quad.

NOW Brandon Moss (see the HERO of Friday’s game) had to have an emergency appendectomy on Saturday. That’s right: our back up back up outfielder almost died.

This is really out there. We are getting to the point where I think the Red Sox should make Osama bin Laden the starting centerfielder so he will immediately spontaneously combust.

Stay healthy out there guys.

Game 31: Teach Your Children Well

Final Score: Boston Red Sox 7, Tampa Bay Rays 3

Hey, the kids are alright! This was a game almost completely dominated by the Sox young guys. Sure they stayed up past their bed time (thanks to a 2hr+ rain delay) but they had that youthful energy going all night.

Buchholz (age 23) was pretty good over 5 innings. He threw a few too many pitches (hurt by the 4 walks) but his stuff was very very good (6 K). Buchholz would have had a much different line if it wasn’t for a huge defensive play from Brandon Moss (age 24). Moss got the start for the ailing Coco and Drew and made the most of it by throwing out Carl Crawford at home. The kids got a cannon.

As good as the pitching and defense was, the real news is the return of the bats. Finally the Sox lumber-slumber was disturbed in a big way. They put up a crooked number in the 4th for what seemed like the first time in a month. The big inning was an amalgam of young players making big hits. Moss hit his second homer of the year, Pedroia (age 24) had an RBI double and Jacoby (age 24) stole second and scored (he still hasn’t been caught in the majors). Not bad for a group of guys that could combine their ages and still be younger than Curt Schilling.

A great win capped off by Papelbon (an ancient 28) closing the door with 7 pitches (all strikes) polishing off the Rays. We needed this after the sweep last week in Florida. We can’t be losing 4 in a row to Tampa Bay… that’s a level of humiliation that I’m not ready to accept.

Game 158: Back in the Saddle Again!

Final Score: Boston Red Sox 11, Oakland Athletics 6

YOUK! MANNY! I remember these guys! These are guys that get on base. Guys that score runs. Guys that have weird hair. These are the Red Sox I remember. Enough of this Hinske, Moss, Kielty garbage. Those guys are fine in small doses, but this is the stretch run and we need to dance with the boys that brung us.

Jon “The Molester” Lester brought his “A” game when it comes to strikeouts (9) but not his best night on everything else. 4 earned in just 4.2 innings from the golden boy. Might not make the playoff rotations with outings like that, buddy.

So it was up to our offense (remember that struggling thing?) to cap off the night. Lowell was ready, Pedroia was ready, and yes Manny was ready! Lowell got his 115th RBI giving him more than any Red Sox third baseman EVER! Pedroia got his 8th homer and 2 doubles pretty much locking up the AL Rookie of the Year Award. Finally there was Manny again batting second and hitting like he has been here all month. We’re back baby and ready to restart the Red Sox Nation of Domination.

With the magic number at 2, the best news of the night might be the realization that the Sox don’t have to face Johan Santana in this 4 game clash with Minnesota. Come on you Great Lake jokers… drop a few for your Boston buddies. We need this.

Oh… and the Yankees clinched a playoff birth. Good for them… have fun with the Wild Card.

Conspiracies of the Post Season

I was looking through Google for any news of the return of Manny to the lineup this weekend when I came across this notes page on MLB.com. The stuff about Manny (which is no longer up to date) is at the top, but the last item concerns Brandon Moss, the Pawtucket call-up who did duty in left against Tampa Bay to spell the aching Jacoby Ellsbury. This sentence in particular jumped out at me: "Moss, an outfielder by trade, will play a little bit of first base in a winter ball stint in the Dominican Republic."

Unlike Ellsbury, Moss is not a top-rated prospect, and the section's conclusion, "with all the outfielders that the Red Sox have under their contractual control, Moss might increase his chances of making the 2008 team by learning a new position," gives the impression of a super-utility player in the works. But Moss's minor-league numbers give the profile of a potential slugger, and I wonder if the Sox are preparing Moss to be an "only if necessary" option if they can't sign Mike Lowell or Alex Rodriguez for next year, where Youkilis would move to third base and Moss would take over at first.

Speaking of post-season doings, the Yankees made things a little easier for the Sox last night by losing the final game of their series to Toronto, pushing Boston's AL East lead to 5.5 games. Should another disastrous sweep occur, that half game might become pretty important. On the more positive side, though: the Sox stand poised to win their 90th game tonight, with fifteen games left to play. Smashing the franchise record (105 games in 1912) is impossible for this year, but how about breaking 100 wins for the first time since 1946?