Friday, April 28, 2006

Game 22: Step Into My Office

Final Score:

Boston Red Sox 3, Cleveland Indians 15

“I been bad… I know it”

Terry Francona: “Josh, come on in. Take a seat. We got some things we gotta work out.”

Josh Beckett: “Coach… I know I didn’t do so hot…”

TF: “’Didn’t do so hot’?
You got shelled out there boy! 8 runs and 100 pitches in less than four innings. Owned by Ben Broussard? Who the hell is that? You got your clock cleaned and good. Now what am I gonna do with you?

JB: “Coach… listen. It was one game. I couldn’t get loose. Manny got his dread wax in my jock again. Ortiz made his mango salsa and you know how that stuff gets ya. But I’m really sorry.”

TF: “Sorry? Son, like it or not we are a pitching team this year. We can’t run the bases, we don’t have a good outfield defense, and we haven’t been scoring runs. That means that we NEED good pitching to win games. You understand me?”

JB: “I understand 100%. Really I do.”

TF: “I know Papelbon has been good. He and Foulke have been carrying the bullpen. Schilling has been better than we hoped and HELL even Clement hasn’t embarrassed himself. But with Wakefield and Bard playing “slap nuts” and you dropping a load like you did your last two starts… well it don’t take a
sabermetric-magician to figure out we’re sunk.”

JB: “You don’t need to worry about me coach. Next time I'm gonna be better. I swear.”

TF: “Well you goddamn better be because “next time” it’s the Yankees and they score 15 runs in their sleep. Alright… who’s next to get yelled at?”

JB: “Well the entire offence was supposed to be next, but it looks like they haven’t shown up.”

TF: “Well at least they're consistent at something. Damn it! Send Delcarmen in. I need to remind him that his ERA shouldn’t equal his age. OH and if anyone tells you ‘It’s only April’ you kick ‘em square in the junk.”