Saturday, September 02, 2006

Game 135: At what cost, people? At what cost…

Final Score:

Boston Red Sox 2, Toronto Blue Jays 1

“Is that my team in there??? IS THAT MY TEAM???”

On almost any other day after a Sox win, especially one behind a strong performance by a nobody (Snyder), I would be jumping for joy and saying that there is light at the end of this dark tunnel. However, it seems the tunnel has been bricked up from both ends. Sox fans will slowly waste away in this de-facto tomb, never seeing the light of day, succumbing to loss and loneliness and eventually passing on to a place that isn’t any better. From there the metaphor gets depressing.

Papelbon left in the 9th with a shoulder injury. What was ONCE thought to be only a strain might now be rotator cuff problems. As you know, Lester has cancer and may pitch again in a couple years if he gets better. Oh, and Schilling is having shoulder troubles and will miss HIS next start. All of this on top of the laundry list of injuries that has TANKED the Red Sox 2006 season. After pouring over these facts, I can only come to one conclusion:

The Red Sox have pissed off some old GYPSY and now the team is dying under her dark voodoo magic.

I mean what else could possibly explain all this? I feel like I’m taking crazy pills! This is like some a quickly and poorly written Steven King novel… just END ALREADY! I can’t take the horror and the pain anymore. It has gotten to the point where I want the season to end so the players can go home and be with their families before MORE awful things befall them.

So tonight some 37 year old wash up named Jarvis is going to be pitching for the Red Sox. If things keep going this way, he will be killed in the 5th inning when an anvil falls on his head.
GO (into the witness protection program) SOX!