Final Score: Boston Red Sox 0, Cleveland Indians 1A year ago I witnessed Fausto languishing in his training room. He lamented that he had learned all the pitching knowledge he needed to smite his foes… and yet they beat him back. The Sox, the glorious scarlet sox of Boston did defeat him. In the cruelest fashion was Fausto humiliated by this crimson hosiery, not once… but twice. Heroically was he cast down in front of teaming crowds… and there he did swear his revenge.
Before his vengeance was realized, he lived in solitude near the outskirts of limbo (Buffalo, NY) and honed his skills, yet even he knew this was a fool’s errand. He was just a skilled novice and nothing more. And so he sought out the dark lord Mephistopheles in hopes to gain power enough to vanquish those that have embarrassed him. After an ancient incantation and arcane ritual, the Devil appeared in a puff of black smoke and brimstone. Fausto then traded his immortal soul for the pitching ability he so greatly desired.
The cur! The foul beast! Is Satan’s bargain covered by the players association or even Scott Boras? Isn’t this some sort of performance enhancing drug? Can Cleveland save his soul for another year by picking up his option?
The answers to these pertinent questions did not matter to Fausto. All he knew was revenge and he decided to extract it on the very team the beat him so badly. The poor Red Sox didn’t stand a chance when facing Fausto’s infernally improved pitches. Lament feeble Sox bats. This is the legion of Hell you face, not just Fausto and the Indians.
Alas it was too late. The Red Sox succumbed to his prowess and Fausto redeemed himself at their expense.
I hope it was worth it Fausto Carmona. Eternal damnation is your reward… well that and the 1-0 victory. I hope it was worth it.
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