Friday, May 12, 2006

Game 34: Can I get a Witness?

Final Score:

Boston Red Sox 5, New York Yankees 3

They came, I saw, Sox conquered

For those of you who are unfamiliar with my situation, I live in New York (how could you not know that? It’s in the title of the damn blog). If I want to see a baseball game, my options are (a) Mets or (b) Yankees. As a Red Sox fan I usually choose option (c) Stay at home and watch the Sox on MLBtv. However, every so often my buddy the Yankees fan (thanks Mike) will give me a call and ask if I want to partake in his season tickets and watch a game at the Stadium. Every time the Red Sox are in town I hold my breath and wait by the phone like a technician in a nuke silo and missiles have just been spotted in Cuba. Have a spare… please have a spare… come on and ring damn it. YES! I got the call. I got to see the rubber match live and in person. Life is sweet.

Now, there are a couple of things I keep in mind when visiting rival territory.

1. Be mindful about your attire. If you don’t want Vinny and Vito telling you to “go back to Boston” for 9 innings, a cap and bright red shirt might not be the best choice. I went with a blue Boston Red Sox shirt with white lettering. I represent incognito.

2. Be respectful. Cheering too loudly and being a jerk is a great way to get your ass kicked by 55,000 Bronx gentlemen. Plus, I was with Yankee fans and I want them to ask me back when the Sox play here in two weeks.

3. Bring money. Just like Fenway. $7.75 for a Bud Light? This better be the best beer ever! Huh, you got lucky.

I tried to follow these rules the best I could. I enjoy the rivalry and I don’t want to be viewed as one of those “bad fans,” whatever that means. It’s interesting going into the lion's den and having to abide by their customs. I felt like a pilgrim in an unholy land. But as the game progressed I found it was easy to forget rule #2:

On Matsui’s injury: “Haha!! I mean… ouch. That sucks.”

On Wakefield pitching: “Sit down Giambi you juicer! I mean… wow, he didn’t look good on that pitch.”

On the Sox clutch hitting: “15 men left on base? They should be up by 8 runs! I mean… oh Chacon got out of another jam. What good defense by Crosby and Damon. Oh who am I kidding? F*** this!”

On Mariano Rivera: “Yeah that’s some insurance bitch! Willie Harris is bustin you UP! It really sucked the life out of this place! I mean… oh darn look at that. Another run. Oh well.”


On the win: “Take that motherf******! 2 out of 3 in your house! What else you got? Ummm… I mean… Tough loss chaps! Cheer up though. I’m sure you’ll get us next time!”

Anyway a good time was had by all (especially me) and the Red Sox prevail in one of the more frustrating games of the year. My ass remains un-kicked, we got a big win, and the Sox take some home against Texas. Meanwhile, the Yankees have to make due with Crosby and Cabrera in the outfield corners. Yikes. That really makes me thankful for Wily Mo.

Next up is a visit from the Lone Star State and Clement vs Loe. I know everything is bigger in Texas; do they export? Does it go for win streaks too? I think it does... GO SOX.