In the head of this man, a mind of twisted geniusRobin and I were discussing the piece in today’s NY Times about Pedro’s love of gardening. While it certainly gives the picture of a man who has found an almost Zen balance to his life, since we all know that Pedro is a Bad Ass Mother F***er on the mound, we couldn’t help but think of a few comparisons to movie villains to match up with the dichotomy that is Pedro. To wit:
- Stansfield, the crooked cop played by Gary Oldman in Léon (The Professional). Stansfield listened to Beethoven’s symphonies to clear his mind while he killed people, Pedro talks to flowers to clear his mind before he strikes people out. Somehow this correlation makes sense to me.
- Francisco Scaramanga, the assassin played by Christopher Lee in The Man with the Golden Gun. Scaramanga hunts Bond around his well-groomed private island, Pedro grooms his mini-botanical garden and then goes and hunts hitters with an inside fastball.
- Buffalo Bill, the moth-tending psychopath played by Ted Levine in The Silence of the Lambs. Pedro telling his flowers that they’re going to grow up so pretty is to Buffalo Bill cooing to his moths, except, you know, without Pedro skinning fat chicks or telling batters, “it puts the lotion on its skin or else it gets the bean ball again.” Because we all know that’s really a job for a closer.
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