Sunday, August 12, 2007

Game 117: I Am Sorely Disappointed

Final Score: Boston Red Sox 3, Baltimore Orioles 6

Deep breath.

Count to ten.

Put down that chair; neither it nor the wall you're about to break it on ever did anything to you.

Ok, I'm pretty sure I can type rationally now. I've accepted that Eric Gagne has proven once and for all that he can't come into a game with less than a five run lead to protect. Because now we all know Francona won't go to him in situations where there's even the possibility of a blown save - he'll put someone off the bench on the mound first. If he's lucky, Gagne will have the opportunity to earn the trust he brought with him back bit by bit through some sort of cleanup program. If he's not...well, there's always designation for assignment. To the fifth circle of hell.

Watching Gagne's second game-losing meltdown in three days brought to mind another pitcher who came to Boston with high hopes in the spring of 2006, one Rudy Seanez by name. You might remember Rudy from such tragi-comedy works as "I Put the Game Out of Reach" (staring the Detroit Tigers), "I Nearly Lost the Game for Us" (with Atlanta's Jeff Francoeur) and "Yes, I Just Walked the Winning Run." Or, if you're like me, you blocked out Seanez's second coming to Boston
just as hard core as you did the first time he wore the red stirrups. Except now Gagne's pulling the exact same stunts in the exact same role and I'm starting to get PTSD flashbacks.

Let's wind up this little Gagne hate fest with Robin's theory, which he imparted to me to share with you, dear reader, after he called me up in a blind rage this afternoon. In his opinion, the Yankees actually did win the Eric Gagne bidding sweepstakes, but somehow bought Gagne's silence in the process. Much like Ramiro Mendoza, Gagne's actually an embedded Yankee, determined to bring the Sox down enough for New York to win the AL East. So far, I'd say he's succeeding.